Thanksgiving Rant

kay, i know that i had, like, 0 posts since don't care how many years ago, but i don't have the patience now to apologize on and on about how sorry i am 4 not updating or improving this site. no photos now, tho i did take some pretty awesome ones in the past year on my latest camera. Anyway, i just wanna get this outa my system, 4 now. b4 i 4get...-nvm. anyway, i'll just rant about my latest anger at my parents. i mean, my mom's super nice and all, but that's just more reason 4 her to get yelled at. i don't hate my parents, i just hate some ways that they do things, not that they seem to be able 2 help it. the main thing getting on my nerves all the time is that my family keeps telling me to do something while i'm either already doing it, about to do it, not there yet, i mean- come on! like, i'll get to it! i can think and i know i have to do it, but don't tell me to do something like i have to do it NOW while i'm in the MIDDLE of doing something else! i mean, do you just want me to drop everything i'm doing so that i follow ur direct command?! then you'll yell @ me 4 not doing what i'm already doing, hello~? >____< feel like i wanna punch someone or sumthing right now, but there's no one to do that to. + i'd get yelled at if i take any anger out on little sister X( wassup with that?! i can't even do anything 2 myself bcuz id still get yelled at, people start staring later, some genuinely care and might, like, pray 4 me (seriously? is it that bad 4 me 2 see my own blood when there r ppl out there that can beat and hurt -(can't think of stronger term, but "slash" just doesn't seem to do the trick)(oh here's 1)- and torture ppl, some practically 2 death, slowly? does just scratching myself like i would accidentally on broken plastic really make me insane? crazy? mad? dangerous? dangerously close to crazily roaming the streets with a long sharp blade hacking anyone i see like mad and spreading the influence of my insanity? really~... there's an idea), and some pretend to care and ask me questions like i didn't know any better, or just ignore me and go on, thinking that i just didn't know any better. wazup with THAT? that just annoys me further 2 death than if i didn't even have the courage to hurt myself! >_<#
course, my lil sister's different. she'll never b as easily guilt-tripped as i seem to almost always b. she could not care about anything but things that she likes 4 all any1 els cares. sometimes she seems 2 genuinely get better, actually seems 2 b fun 2 b with, but that's only bcuz we finally have 1 or 2 common hobbys, tho she still annoys me 2 death, esp. when we both <3 music and she she annoys me w/ her piano/violin/ukulele playing, prob enjoying how much better she's catching up 2 me. i'd probably die (not really) if she even touches the guitar that she didn't help in cleaning out at all. 2 bad there's only 1 piano, 1 ukulele, & even if there r 2 violins, technically, they're "her's", and i'd so get yelled @ if i try 'em out w/out her permission, like she'd ever let me. + she always seems 2 b playing sumthing right when i'm in the mood 2 make some music. like, i'd start practicing piano, then she'd go into the room right next 2 the piano and start up that fingerstripless violin without a care 4 each individual note's pitch! that annoy's me so much i can't even concentrate on my own thing, no matter what i'm doing! she could practice upstairs, or even oustide 4 all i care (cuz she even says she sounds better out there), but she just so happens 2 lodge her practicing within hearing range, like she really cares about how much she urgently needs 2 practice 2 hours a week more than she's required 2. and i'm not supposed to care, not supposed to b so bothered by it cuz there shouldn't need 2 b anything so bothersome about it. >:(
GAAAAAHHHH,i hate how much i have 2 stop evrytime some1 walks by 2 make it at least look like im doing my HW! i duper hate doing homework, but i can't do anything if someone knows i'm not doing it! hate school! <3 school! hate HW! love-... well i don't like classwork all that much either. do i care? i don't know! as long as i get to do what i like in the future, then i guess...? i mean, if i don't like it now, i don't think i'll like to use it 4 the rest of my life, so i think my grades do truly represent and reflect my best interests and abilities, and i might just go for what i can do now. if only what i like to do now would b very prospective(?) 4 my future.
ope! gotta go! ^_^ my family's going ice skating, so i know that'll so totally lighten my mood enuff that i'd forget how angry and annoyed i am right now. i'm too easy... Seeya! (don't know when, tho...) TeeheesXD